PixelVixen707

I won’t blow anyone’s mind here if I point out that the sword is a phallic symbol, right?

That makes Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars a story about emasculation. Our hero, the spoiled, soft rich boy Huang Lee, has come to Liberty City, America with a sword - the Yu-Jian, an ancient heirloom and a symbol of family honor. Of course, Yu-Jian is also just a trophy that Huang’s late father picked up in a card game. But honor is honor, whatever it’s based on, and Huang is charged with delivering the sword to his uncle - until gunmen meet him in the airport, nab the blade, and leave Huang for dead on the street.

So begins Huang’s journey through the Chinese criminal underworld in Liberty City. To get the sword back, he takes to the streets, working with sleezebags, Triad underbosses and corrupt lawmen. And in their own ways, all of them are emasculated too - bound to concepts of machismo and honor that none of them have the balls to live up to.

The brand new hand-held cavalcade of felonies, Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars, boasts a single, thin storyline - and an array of side quests and other activities. Many players get hooked on drug dealing: you can travel between a series of dealers skulking around the city, buying pills low and selling them high, or following a tip on low-priced coke or a buyer who’s desperate to get rocked off his nipples on pot. It’s a simple but well-tuned trading game with an element of risk: hard-to-spot security cameras hide everywhere, and if you get arrested while you’re holding, the cops will rob you blind. But if you stay sharp and make the right deals, you can earn tens of thousands of dollars in no time.

But I found a better, even more addictive habit. I buy scratch tickets.